Paging Mr. Hernandez, please come to the front of the cabin to be arrested

The Rapid Traveler awoke from fitful slumber this morning as his 6 am flight touched down and sidled up to the gate. With a good vantage point from seat 2A, he saw the jet bridge hang back, though the attendant looked ready. Last week his flight was temporarily marooned at a JFK gate because the ground crew “directed us to the wrong line” in the words of the captain, and it appeared the incompeticitis was contagious and spreading to other airports.

The flight attendant made an unconvincing announcement: “Passengers, due to a problem with the jet bridge, please remain in your seats while we sort it out.”

Smith & Wesson Handcuffs

Photo by The.Comedian

Hushed discussion and calls followed.

Then, a follow-up, “Passenger Hernandez, please come to the front of the cabin.”

No one appeared. More hushed discussion. The jet bridge eventually moved forward and docked. Still more discussion.

“Passengers, please show your ID to the staff waiting on the jet bridge in order to deplane. Thank you for your cooperation.”

Two police officers dutifully checked IDs as the gumball machine emptied.

The Rapid Traveler didn’t have time to stick around for the denouement but he is curiously checking the news tonight if Mr. Hernandez (name changed) had indeed been on the plane and what kind of infamy flew in on an otherwise sleepy flight.

It reminds The Rapid Traveler of a Newark to Beijing flight a few years ago where US Marshalls escorted a criminal in chains for deportation. The only sounds at the time were the wise-ass business hecklers, “Hey, how come he gets to board first?!”

Readers, what law enforcement stories do you have from your flights?

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